Category Archives: drop in


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CPO Makes Families BIG!

Families come in many shapes and sizes. For this, I am grateful. Twenty years ago when I started thinking about having my own family, I never knew how big and beautiful it would become.

I became pregnant with Hank in 2002. He was born in March of 2003. He was 5 weeks early and we were both pretty sick. I had never heard of the HELLP syndrome, but I had it and the only way to fix it is to have the baby. Therefore, I had a preemie. (Hank was soon thriving and is now a healthy, happy 16 year old.)

In 2007, we decided we wanted to add to our family, but knew that pregnancy could be risky. So, we found CPO. That summer, we got a “drop in”. His name is Barrett. His birth parents weren’t in a place to parent, so I woke up one day a mother of one child and by 10 that morning, I had two boys!!

A year later, those same two birth parents had another baby boy. Eli was lovingly placed with the Hisey family. We wondered how we would navigate these waters, but both of our families knew that we wanted the boys to have a relationship since they were biological brothers. It was fun to watch these two boys. We made it a point to get them together at least a couple of times a year. We knew then that Eli and Barrett would have an incredible bond that we wanted to nurture and support. We also agreed that our other children should be considered family as well. We didn’t want to leave anyone out.

A few years later, the same two birth parents had another baby. It was a boy, Dax, and he was placed with the Hisey family too. So Barrett had another brother. We were thrilled. Again, we would get these boys together and talk about the way their eyes crinkled up and shined when they smiled or how that had the same “duck tail” on the back of their hair. I loved having this for Barrett. And for Hank.

A few years later, Abigail was born. Same birth parents. We couldn’t believe that we had a sister. She was placed with the Domer’s and we were all immediately smitten. When she was a baby, we would say she looked like Barrett with a bow in her hair!!

Today, we live in Tulsa, the Hiseys are in Enid and the Domers are in Broken Arrow. I would love to say that we see each other all of the time, but you know how life is. School, sports, church, families, etc make schedules complicated. But, I will tell you that my heart holds not only Hank and Barrett, but also the Hisey and Domer children.

Barrett loves having his younger siblings. In our house, he is the baby. But, with his biological siblings, he’s the big brother.

When Barrett was “graduating” from elementary school, all of the 5th graders were interviewed for a supplement for the year book. Some of the questions included favorite color, nickname, etc. But, I was speechless when I saw his answer to the question about siblings. He said, “ I’ve got two biological brothers, a biological sister, 2 step sisters and a brother. “ There is so much I love about this. 1. His biological family is always in his heart. 2. Hank is just that, his brother. 3. He is proud of his diverse family. It may not be like his friends, but it’s his and he’s happy.

At the end of the day, I have a really big, beautiful family. We pray for each other, celebrate each other and love each other. We know that our children have something really special that we want to honor. We are so grateful that these birth parents chose life and chose us. It’s all a great big blessing from God that gave us a wonderful, big family.


Retro CPO: Meet Kelly Jacobson

Each month we will feature a “retro” CPO article, one that is pulled from our archives of quarterly newsletters. Whenever possible we will provide details regarding the author and date of publication.
This month’s Retro CPO article was written by Kelly Jacobson, one of Cheryl’s assistants at the time (and still!). It was written in winter of 2009, and is her personal testimony.

I began volunteering for CPO sometime in 1996. At the time, i just wanted to support a pro-life ministry, because at 19, I had an abortion. I believe that if I had known of a crisis pregnancy ministry, I would have made a different choice.

Sometime along the way, God gave me a strong desire to adopt. Steven and I turned in our life book in December of 1997, but since we had three biological kids already, we wanted to only adopt a “special needs baby.”

We expected to wait for a long time, but in only two weeks Cheryl called to tell us about Jewel. She was born 9 weeks early, and only weighed 2 lbs., 14 oz. And that began our “adoption adventure.” We now have seven awesome kids and are blessed beyond measure.

In 2002, we moved to Denver and spent three years separated, in body but not in spirit, from CPO. In 2005, we moved to Owasso and got more involved than ever.

I love CPO.  I love watching God work miracles in the lives of birth moms and adoptive families… not to mention the awesome baby stories.

I love CPO because it gives women the help they need to choose life in a society that promotes death.

I love CPO because without it, I wouldn’t have my babies.

I love CPO and I feel privileged to serve.

My husband, Steven, works for Level3 in Tulsa. Our blessings are Madeline (16), Aaron (15), Elaina (13), Jewel (11), Isaac (9), Nate (7), and Zachary (16 months). We are a trans.racial family and I have a passion for racial reconciliation. I love to encourage anyone who has questions about transracial adoption.

The whole Jacobson crew!


Retro CPO: Meet Paige Tooman

Each month we will feature a “retro” CPO article, one that is pulled from our archives of quarterly newsletters. Whenever possible we will provide details regarding the author and date of publication. 
This month’s Retro CPO article was written by Paige Tooman, one of Cheryl’s assistants at the time. It was written in fall of 2009, and is her personal testimony. 

I am so honored to be part of such an incredible ministry! I love serving alongside Godly women who have been doing this for so many years and I continue to learn more and more each day! Being an Assistant Director never crossed my mind as we began our journey with CPO.

My husband Brent and I were baptized together in 2002, and we were on the amazing road of Christianity together. We had just found out that we were pregnant, after one round of Clomid, a fertility drug. We were so thankful that God had blessed us and couldn’t wait for our newest family member. Our 34 week check up went great, but then I began to get very sick. I tried to play it off as part of being pregnant, but after a week of sleepless nights, I called the doctor. I was admitted to the hospital and they determined that my liver had shut down and my kidneys were next. This was part of the HELLP Syndrome, something I had developed during pregnancy. Needless to say, we were rushed to the OR for an emergency C-section and Hank was born! He was a strong baby and he and I were both in the hospital for about 10 days. After arriving home, I basically was on “lock down”, as I didn’t want my preemie to get any kinds of sickness at all! He is now a strong, healthy six year old, no one would ever even know about his early arrival if I didn’t tell them.

We decided we wanted to add to our family, but we were told that I could get HELLP again. We had heard about CPO through several different friends and we decided to give Cheryl a call.That is when it all starts happening. We received a call several months into the process about a baby that was being born in three hours. THREE HOURS?? This was out baby, Barrett, or as we call him, Bear. His birth parents rode to the hospital on a motorcycle, in the rain, so we knew they were a spirited pair! We started to get to know them in the hospital and then we lost touch with them after the hospital stay. We were so sad about not having the open adoption that we had thought about so often. We wanted to minister to a girl and help her find God and get her life on His path. Fortunately, God had His plan in place and Bear now has a baby brother that was adopted by the Hiseys and we have an incredible Christian family to share our lives with!

After all of the love and time that Cheryl and Kelly showed us, I decided that I wanted to give back to CPO and I got involved with the fundraising banquet. I loved sharing CPO’s vision with others and trying to get funds for our “all-volunteer” agency! When I became an Assistant, I knew that this was my calling. I am the type of person that needs to be involved. I also knew that if I was going to be volunteering and away from my kids at times, this would be perfect because when I am volunteering for CPO, I am multiplying His kingdom. I can truly see God each day as I look into the faces of the birth mothers, the babies, and the families. My you all find your place in CPO, as I did. It is truly a blessing!

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Retro CPO: “This Day Could Be My Last”

Each month we will feature a “retro” CPO article, one that is pulled from our archives of quarterly newsletters. Whenever possible we will provide details regarding the author and date of publication. This month’s Retro CPO article was written by Teresa, a beautiful birth mother. It was written in spring of 2008.

I look inside myself, desperate to see-
on a mission to discover the “brand new” me.

Am I so different than I was before,
when crack was my god and his servant a whore.

In my memories, I can see the streets.
I feel the loneliness, despair, and defeat.

My body was always exhausted.
I was forever on the move,
money to make,
things to take,
not a second to lose.

The trick was to stay in motion,
not to let thoughts enter my head.
There was a baby growing inside of me.
ALIVE,
when I was so dead.

Did I know I was hurting the baby?
I had to be aware.
The problem was deep inside of me.
I didn’t have the ability to care.

I moved without direction,
no concern for my path.
Why plan for the next day,
when today could be my last.

……….

The following is the “rest of the story”, as told by Cheryl Bauman in 2008.

At that point, Teresa called out to God and asked Him to send someone into her room at Hillcrest, someone that she could trust. Within seconds, He sent a wonderful nurse into her room, and within an hour, I was at the hospital with life books and a promise that CPO would not only find the perfect family for her baby boy, but that we would provide her with all she needed to turn her life around.
Today, Teresa has an excellent job, is growing emotionally and spiritually, and trusts the Lord with her life. She has an awesome relationship with her son’s adoptive parents, and has a renewed relationship with two of her daughters, who live in another state. She has 10 months of being clean and sober, and lives in our transitional home. Gone are the days of being in prison, using drugs to numb the pain of an excruciatingly horrid childhood, and making money however she could. Today, Teresa has begun to believe us when we tell her how precious she is to God, and to us. When I look at her, everything CPO has done to minister to girls and women in crisis pregnancies in the last 25 years seems totally “worth it.” God is so incredibly faithful.

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“I pray that God, the source of hope, will fill you completely with joy and peace because you trust in Him. Then you will overflow with confident hope through the power of the Holy Spirit.” Romans 15:13 NLT


Retro CPO: From My Heart to Hers

Each month we will feature a “retro” CPO article, one that is pulled from our archives of quarterly newsletters. Whenever possible we will provide details regarding the author and date of publication.

This month’s Retro CPO article was written by an adoptive mother, Shonni Hassoldt, in the summer of 2005.

As I walked into the hospital room where I knew she lay, I felt so unsure, nervous, and hesitant. In one of the most wonderful times of my life, how should I respond to the one who just gave birth to our little boy and had made the painful and courageous decision to give that precious child to another to raise?

For years, Steve and I had hoped to be chosen by a birth mother to parent her baby. Yes, we have six children, yet deep inside we knew that God had more for us. With excitement and a determined trust in God’s best, we waited. Finally, on December 1, 2004, we received the exciting news that a birth mother had chosen our family for her baby, which was due any week!

I felt so blessed, but even more than that, I felt very honored to be chosen by this woman I had never met. I wanted to somehow communicate what was in my heart: not just gratitude, but a deep feeling of God bringing our hearts together in a uniquely special way, through the wonder of adoption.

Now, two weeks later, on the threshold of her hospital door, I trembled with the excitement of seeing our baby and our birth mother. With a quick prayer that I would say and do the right things to comfort her and help her feel at ease, I walked in with our 11-year-old daughter, who had come with me.

There she was. I walked right up to her and hugged her. She was so beautiful and so gracious. Before my eyes was a stranger, yes. However, she was just a woman, like me, only in a different situation. How I admired and wondered at her strength! She had the courage to make an adoption plan for her baby, choosing lovingly to endure her own pain. We spent time talking and getting to know one another. She smiled and talked and put ME at ease. I was so anxious to see the baby, but it was almost an hour before they brought him in. Finally, there he was, and I hesitated again. What was my role in this situation? I wanted to rejoice over our new baby, and I wanted SO MUCH not to forget this precious lady who had just given birth to him and loved him deeply. God in His GREAT LOVE helped us find our places in a little hospital room. What were those places? Two women openly adoring the miracle of this tiny little baby and sharing the deeply intimate love of two mothers.

Now, our little boy is six months old, and like all children, he is a blessing and a gift from the Lord. We all enjoy him so much. I love sharing with our birth mother what our little boy is doing, what he looks like, and how everything is going. She will always be a part of us. She gave us the most precious gift one could give, and she will always hold a piece of my heart. And, in my heart, there will always be a place that belongs only to her. Our baby is a blessing, but the true miracle took place in a little hospital room, when God brought two mothers together, and a baby found home.

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Retro CPO: How I Feel About Adoption

Each month we will feature a “retro” CPO article, one that is pulled from our archives of quarterly newsletters. Whenever possible we will provide details regarding the author and date of publication.

This month’s Retro CPO article was written by a birthmom, L*, in the Summer of 2004.

My adoption plan was very quick. I met Cheryl and picked out a family the day before my son was born. I didn’t even meet the adoptive family until after I met my son. I don’t think any of us birth moms can put into words the emotions you feel when someone else leaves the hospital with your child and you leave the hospital with nothing, but it is a feeling I hope to never experience again. To make it worse, I didn’t even know the people who took my son home that day. But thanks to open adoption, I had the comfort of knowing that when he and I were ready to meet each other we would know where to find each other.

Open adoption is truly a gift. Living with my adoption decision is sometimes difficult, but all I have to do it look at all the pictures I have received of my son’s smiling face ad I know that I made the right choice. I was lucky to be raised in a good home, and now I am blessed to have been able to help and provide for my son the opportunities that I was provided as a child. I am truly blessed to have met Cheryl that day and to have found the right home for my son, C*.

Talking about my story used to be difficult for me, but now, one and a half years after I chose open adoption, I am excited to tell people in hopes that they will have a more open mind about all kinds of adoption, and a more open mind in their perceptions of unwed mothers. I recently gave a speech to a class at the University of Oklahoma about open adoption. Hopefully, through me and all the girls here at CPO, the message can be spread, and more babies given life.

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*The names of the women and children CPO helps are often redacted for privacy purposes.

 


Decades of Dedicated Service

This article was originally published in September 2013, by Rhonda Fisher.

Marilyn Guthmann is a long-time volunteer at CPO. In fact, she’s been volunteering since its inception more than 30 years ago! This week, we wanted to honor her dedication, while also highlighting her current area of expertise: the CPO office.

Over the years, Marilyn has volunteered in many different areas at CPO. She has hosted several girls in her home, provided transportation for girls, been a labor coach, and even helped organize fundraisers and other events. Currently, she volunteers in the office every week. Marilyn says that her most memorable office experience was a time when she received a phone call from a hospitalized girl who wanted to place her baby for adoption as a drop-in. It was a while ago, but she still remembers the phone call with fondness.

Her story illustrates the overall importance of our office volunteers. She says, “Some days there are lots of calls, and some days there are none.” Our office volunteers make sure they are there when the calls do come in. But Marilyn says not to worry about not being adequate to work in the office. “Somebody will be there to train you and tell you what you need to do. Really, it’s not that hard. And if you don’t have the answers [for a girl on a phone call] then you can always call one of the assistants and they will call the girl back. Even after 30 years, I still sometimes feel inadequate, I don’t always have all the answers, but I often call one of the assistants and talk to them about it. They are our resources. Everyone has skills to answer the phone and talk to someone who walks into the office.”

Marilyn says that her time spent volunteering for CPO over the years has been beneficial to her. “It makes you think about other people, and the stuff that they’re going through. It changes your focus.” Which gets me thinking… “I will focus on Your honor and majestic splendor, and Your amazing deeds!” (Psalm 145:5, NET)

Thanks again to Marilyn Guthmann for her years of dedication to the cause of CPO, and for allowing God’s “amazing deeds” to occur through her work!


Small Effort, MAXimum Outcome

This article was originally published in September 2012, by Rhonda Fisher.

When longtime CPO volunteer Laura M. woke up a few weeks ago, she had no idea that her actions that day would have such a monumental importance in people’s lives.

It was Labor Day, and Laura had volunteered to answer the 24-hour emergency phone line for CPO. Of course, she didn’t have to stay at the office on Labor Day. Instead, the phone line is forwarded to her personal cell phone.

This job is important, because crisis pregnancies don’t keep banker’s hours. Women and girls often need someone to talk to in the early morning after their positive pregnancy test, or in the evening after arguing with an unsupportive family member, or in the middle of the night after losing sleep over the fear of the major life change occurring in their bodies. If we don’t answer the phones, especially in this technologically-driven day and age, the prevalent instant gratification mentality might lead a worried girl to just call someone else on the Google search page. Of course, CPO doesn’t want that to happen, because we’ve then lost the opportunity to change a life and minister to her.

When Laura’s phone rang this time, it wasn’t a worried girl or a scared woman. It was a social worker, calling from the hospital where a new baby had just been born the night before. The social worker informed Laura that the birthmother had chosen to make an adoption plan. Based on the birthmother’s request, the social worker called our number first, and Laura was there to answer the call.

“It was a pretty exciting thing, I’ve never had a call like that before,” says Laura. She took the basic information from the social worker, assured her that someone else from CPO would be calling back very soon, and hung up. Laura then made another simple phone call to set off a chain reaction of volunteer efforts that ultimately changed the lives of many people.

Stephanie J. was the assistant “on call” that day. Like all of the workers at CPO, Stephanie’s efforts are completely volunteer-based; she receives no salary. But she’s been involved with CPO for 8 years now, and she currently holds the position of Assistant to the Executive Director. Stephanie is actually one of several assistants; they are the volunteers who are directly involved in bringing adoptive families and birthmothers together.

Stephanie got the information from Laura, and then immediately called the social worker. She got as much information from the social worker as possible, and then set to work. First, she sent a text to the other assistants asking for the names of waiting families who were open to the idea of a drop in–accepting a newborn who is waiting at the hospital, often leaving the family with only hours to prepare.

That’s when Courtney B. got involved. She went to the CPO offices and collected several Life Books of waiting families that were willing to accept a drop in, and headed to the hospital.

At the hospital, Courtney was introduced to the birthmother, K*, and her mom. Soon, other CPO volunteers arrived to help. Stephanie came and so did Ana S.  K and her mother were very grateful for the quick action of CPO volunteers, and commented several times on their professionalism and their genuine desire to help.

Courtney had already given them the Life Books, and when they called Courtney, Stephanie and Ana back into the room, they were very secure in their decision. They had found something in common with their chosen family on almost every page. “It was a God thing, for sure,” says Ana.

Once the adoptive family had been chosen, it was time to let them know that they had a new baby boy waiting for them at the hospital.

Abby B. and her family were in Kansas City. They had attended a music festival that weekend and were almost ready to head home when the phone rang. Their young daughter had been lamenting that all the fun was over, but little did she know it was just about to begin. Abby answered the phone and was informed by Stephanie that there was a baby boy waiting for them at the hospital in Tulsa. He would be released to go home the next day.

“I asked [Stephanie] if she was serious. I know they don’t just call to joke about these things, but… you know,” says Abby. She hung up the phone and told her husband and daughter, and the packing frenzy began.

As soon as they had packed up everything, they started the drive toward their new baby. “That was the longest car ride ever from Kansas City. I’m a musician, so I always have music, but I didn’t even think about turning it on.” On the way home, they considered possible names for the new baby boy, made plans for Annabelle to spend the night with a friend, and mulled over the logistics of how to gather all the needed supplies within 24 hours.

When they arrived at the hospital, they met K and her mom. They talked about the baby, and discussed possible names. When they got to “Max Andrew” on the list, everyone involved thought that name was the best. Soon, Max was brought in to the hospital room and introduced to his new parents. Abby says, “God really has a strange (to us, at least) way of working things out, down to the details. It’s a good thing He’s in charge.”

Meanwhile, Laura, the volunteer who put this amazing story in motion, continued with her plans for the day. Because of her, Abby and her family have a new little guy hanging around, and K has begun attending the weekly support meetings offered at CPO. “I’m glad to be able to help out in a small way,” says Laura. But at CPO, no volunteer’s efforts are “small”. They all have the potential to have a MAXimum outcome.

This job is important, because crisis pregnancies don’t keep banker’s hours. Women and girls often need someone to talk to in the early morning after their positive pregnancy test, or in the evening after arguing with an unsupportive family member, or in the middle of the night after losing sleep over the fear of the major life change occurring in their bodies. If we don’t answer the phones, especially in this technologically-driven day and age, the prevalent instant gratification mentality might lead a worried girl to just call someone else on the Google search page. Of course, CPO doesn’t want that to happen, because we’ve then lost the opportunity to change a life and minister to her.

When Laura’s phone rang this time, it wasn’t a worried girl or a scared woman. It was a social worker, calling from the hospital where a new baby had just been born the night before. The social worker informed Laura that the birthmother had chosen to make an adoption plan. Based on the birthmother’s request, the social worker called our number first, and Laura was there to answer the call.

“It was a pretty exciting thing, I’ve never had a call like that before,” says Laura. She took the basic information from the social worker, assured her that someone else from CPO would be calling back very soon, and hung up. Laura then made another simple phone call to set off a chain reaction of volunteer efforts that ultimately changed the lives of many people.

Stephanie J. was the assistant “on call” that day. Like all of us, Stephanie’s efforts with CPO are completely volunteer-based; she receives no salary. But she’s been involved with CPO for 8 years now, and she currently holds the position of Assistant to the Executive Director. Stephanie is actually one of several assistants; they are the volunteers who are directly involved in bringing adoptive families and birthmothers together.

Stephanie got the information from Laura, and then immediately called the social worker. She got as much information from the social worker as possible, and then set to work. First, she sent a text to the other assistants asking for the names of waiting families who were open to the idea of a drop in–accepting a newborn who is waiting at the hospital, often leaving the family with only hours to prepare.

That’s when Courtney B. got involved. She went to the CPO offices and collected several Life Books of waiting families that were willing to accept a drop in, and headed to the hospital.

At the hospital, Courtney was introduced to the birthmother, K*, and her mom. Soon, other CPO volunteers arrived to help. Stephanie came and so did Ana S.  K and her mother were very grateful for the quick action of CPO volunteers, and commented several times on their professionalism and their genuine desire to help.

Courtney had already given them the Life Books, and when they called Courtney, Stephanie and Ana back into the room, they were very secure in their decision. They had found something in common with their chosen family on almost every page. “It was a God thing, for sure,” says Ana.

Once the adoptive family had been chosen, it was time to let them know that they had a new baby boy waiting for them at the hospital.

Abby B. and her family were in Kansas City. They had attended a music festival that weekend and were almost ready to head home when the phone rang. Their young daughter had been lamenting that all the fun was over, but little did she know it was just about to begin. Abby answered the phone and was informed by Stephanie that there was a baby boy waiting for them at the hospital in Tulsa. He would be released to go home the next day.

“I asked [Stephanie] if she was serious. I know they don’t just call to joke about these things, but… you know,” says Abby. She hung up the phone and told her husband and daughter, and the packing frenzy began.

As soon as they had packed up everything, they started the drive toward their new baby. “That was the longest car ride ever from Kansas City. I’m a musician, so I always have music, but I didn’t even think about turning it on.” On the way home, they considered possible names for the new baby boy, made plans for Annabelle to spend the night with a friend, and mulled over the logistics of how to gather all the needed supplies within 24 hours.

When they arrived at the hospital, they met K and her mom. They talked about the baby, and discussed possible names. When they got to “Max Andrew” on the list, everyone involved thought that name was the best. Soon, Max was brought in to the hospital room and introduced to his new parents. Abby says, “God really has a strange (to us, at least) way of working things out, down to the details. It’s a good thing He’s in charge.”

Meanwhile, Laura, the volunteer who put this amazing story in motion, continued with her plans for the day. Because of her, Abby and her family have a new little guy hanging around, and K has begun attending the weekly support meetings offered at CPO. “I’m glad to be able to help out in a small way,” says Laura. But at CPO, no volunteer’s efforts are “small”. They all have the potential to have a MAXimum outcome.


*The names of the women CPO helps are always redacted for privacy purposes.