Retro CPO: How I Feel About Adoption

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Each month we will feature a “retro” CPO article, one that is pulled from our archives of quarterly newsletters. Whenever possible we will provide details regarding the author and date of publication.

This month’s Retro CPO article was written by a birthmom, L*, in the Summer of 2004.

My adoption plan was very quick. I met Cheryl and picked out a family the day before my son was born. I didn’t even meet the adoptive family until after I met my son. I don’t think any of us birth moms can put into words the emotions you feel when someone else leaves the hospital with your child and you leave the hospital with nothing, but it is a feeling I hope to never experience again. To make it worse, I didn’t even know the people who took my son home that day. But thanks to open adoption, I had the comfort of knowing that when he and I were ready to meet each other we would know where to find each other.

Open adoption is truly a gift. Living with my adoption decision is sometimes difficult, but all I have to do it look at all the pictures I have received of my son’s smiling face ad I know that I made the right choice. I was lucky to be raised in a good home, and now I am blessed to have been able to help and provide for my son the opportunities that I was provided as a child. I am truly blessed to have met Cheryl that day and to have found the right home for my son, C*.

Talking about my story used to be difficult for me, but now, one and a half years after I chose open adoption, I am excited to tell people in hopes that they will have a more open mind about all kinds of adoption, and a more open mind in their perceptions of unwed mothers. I recently gave a speech to a class at the University of Oklahoma about open adoption. Hopefully, through me and all the girls here at CPO, the message can be spread, and more babies given life.


*The names of the women and children CPO helps are often redacted for privacy purposes.